The Inheritance You Never Chose

limi the firefly at the centre of a dining room table with a multiracial family

What if your pain didn’t start with you?

We’re taught to see our thoughts, behaviours, and emotions as entirely our own. If we struggle, we assume the fault is internal. But what if the roots of your anxiety, perfectionism, people-pleasing—or even your sense of worth—stretch far beyond you?

That’s the radical insight that shapes Life and Me. Our approach is grounded not just in psychology, but in cultural anthropology—specifically, the work of French sociologist Pierre Bourdieu. His ideas help us see that so much of who we are is shaped by what we’ve inherited.

And not just genetics—but worldviews. Roles. Reflexes. Rules.

Let’s take a look at three of Bourdieu’s key concepts that power the healing journey inside the Life & Me app:

 

Habitus: The Cultural Operating System You Didn’t Know Was Running

Your habitus is the set of unconscious patterns you live by—how you speak, trust, withdraw, achieve, or adapt. These aren’t just quirks of personality. They’re learned behaviours, shaped by the environment you grew up in.

Were you taught to stay quiet to avoid conflict? To achieve as a way of earning love? To never show vulnerability? That’s habitus. And it didn’t start with you—it started long before.

In Life and Me, you can uncover these inherited reflexes by chatting with our uniquely trained Ai, Lumi, and through journaling exercises that help you pause, reflect, and choose what serves you now—and what doesn’t.

 

Field: The Worlds You Perform In

We all move through different fields—workplaces, families, social groups, dating, faith communities. Each one comes with its own set of rules, expectations, and norms. Often, we bend ourselves to fit in without even realizing it.

That shapeshifting may have helped you survive. But is it helping you thrive?

Life and Me helps you identify the fields you navigate every day—and reflect on which ones allow you to grow, and which ones require you to shrink.

 

Social Capital: Your Inherited Capacity for Connection

Social capital is the emotional safety net of your life. It’s your support system—or your lack of one. And it’s deeply shaped by what you were taught about trust, vulnerability, and independence.

If you’ve been told not to “burden others,” to “stay strong,” or to “handle it yourself,” you may struggle to ask for help—or to even know what safe connection looks like.

That’s not a personal failure. It’s cultural conditioning. And it can be unlearned.

Inside Life and Me, you’ll explore the ways you were taught to relate—and start building support systems that are rooted in truth, not survival.

 

From Inherited Patterns to Intentional Living

Bourdieu’s work helps us shift from blame to clarity. From “What’s wrong with me?” to “Where did I learn this—and do I still want it?”

Because here’s the truth: these patterns didn’t start with you. But healing can.

At Life and Me, we help you name what you inherited—so you can choose what to carry forward, and what to leave behind.

 

You didn’t choose the script. But now you can choose how the story continues.
Try Life and Me today to begin rewriting yours.

Learn and Grow

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